He/She/They: How We Talk About Gender and Why It Matters

How can we change the conversation around gender, become better allies, challenge misconceptions and make the world a better place?

Anti-transgender legislation is being introduced across the world in record-breaking numbers. Trans people are under attack in sports, healthcare, entertainment, schools, bathrooms and nearly every walk of life.

Schuyler Bailar didn’t set out to be an activist, but his very public transition to the Harvard men’s swim team put him in the spotlight. His choice to be open about his journey and share his experience has touched people around the world. His plain-spoken education has evolved into tireless advocacy for inclusion and collective liberation. In He/She/They, Schuyler uses storytelling and the art of conversation to give us essential language and context of gender, meeting everyone where they are and paving the way for understanding, acceptance and, most importantly, connection. Schuyler clearly and compassionately addresses fundamental topics, from why being transgender is not a choice and why pronouns are important, to more complex issues including how gender-affirming healthcare can be lifesaving and why allowing trans youth to play sports is good for every child.

More than a book on allyship, He/She/They also speaks to trans people directly, answering the question, ‘does it get better?’ with a resounding yes, celebrating radical trans joy. With a relatable narrative rooted in facts, science and history, Schuyler helps restore common sense and humanity to a discussion that continues to be divisively co-opted and deceptively politicized. Myth-busting, affirming and compassionate, He/She/They is a crucial, urgent and lifesaving book that will forever change the conversation about gender.

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''Informative, fabulous to read, and leaves the reader with joy. I love this book!'' Jonathan Van Ness, New York Times bestselling author, and TV personality

''Written for both a trans and a general readership, [this] is a solid introduction to why trans rights matter'' Publisher''s Weekly

''I wish I had this book to guide my own journey years ago, but I am so glad it exists now. We need it!'' Dylan Mulvaney, actress, comedian